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I have been in seclusion (as secluded as I can get with 3 kids) for a whole day now. I just want to be left alone. I have decided not to answer the phone out of fear that it will be more bad news, I'm bad news-ed out (3 in a row, I'm ready for this month to be over now).

I had a delusional dream of my future when I was 12 and carried it for 14 years, I thought my dog and I would grow old together. In some ways, it is true, we did grow together and she was there for all my major life changes.

In a military family, there isn't much stability other than your family. And my family was not what you would call stable. I came home from 7th grade one day to see the cutest puppy I've ever seen and bonded with her faster and more so than I have ever done with anyone before then and even after then (minus my children of course).

Lady was the constant in my life when things around me became so uncertain and scary. She was the warmth in a home that I remember being so cold growing up.

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